i’ve been pretty swamped with church vbs lately…

i was reading over a couple of my previous posts and.. i don’t know what to say about them… countless people have asked me if i’m alright.. and i seem fine… i’ve actually been told that that one post about my grandfather depressing enough to cry over… shrug.. he’s not your grandfather… i honestly don’t know what’s wrong.. or if anything’s really wrong…

lately i’ve been picking fights with every girl that talks to me. and i’m talking every girl… today i got into qualms with 3 girls in seperate occasions.. i mean.. it’s gone to the point that i almost yelled at jina last saturday… *shrug.. of the.. “top girls” of my life.. i’m currently only talking to jennifer on a regular basis.. but that’s because i always have arguments with her.. and well.. are friendship just blows it over.. i don’t know.. i really don’t know..

a couple weeks back, a group of the guys went over to joey’s house and we were rudely kicked out of his apartment by his neighbor.. she was a hateful.. angry woman.. it made me wonder.. do you think.. she knew when she began to .. act that way?.. i mean.. sometimes.. i see.. older woman walking on the street.. and i think in the back of my head.. at one point, i’m sure this woman was once a cute girl.. but now..

where is my path leading me right now?.. i really don’t know.. sometimes.. i feel like… hmm.. i’m bitter.. bitter about something.. bitter about life.. and the bitterness is just overwhelming me.. and i’m getting tired.. sick and tired.. and i’m growing impatient.. and my fuse is getting popped… i’m exhausted about everything having to be peachy.. i hate all the compromising.. i always have to give too much.. i’m not lonely.. i just want to be alone.. i don’t know what i want..

it’s 2:50 in the morning.. i need to wake up in 4 hours for vbs…

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