i don’t know what to say in this post.. it’s been a while since i wrote here.. and a lots happened since. what happened in the last post is really a vague memory to me. i guess i blocked it out. i remember feeling helpless. i remember feeling alone. i remember fake smiles and real ones. i remember my friends. i miss my friends. some more and more each day.. i don’t miss some of them though.. i realize how many hours i wasted with them. i made some new friends since.. i’ve pushed some away. i grown close to one. and the person i miss more and more. it’s a new year again.. and again a new beginning.. i’m in a new school. have to start all over again. change is good when change is good. i need to change. i want to learn the drums. i want to buy a snow board. i want to buy a xbox. i want to go to the gym. it’s been a while since i went. been a while since i did many things. been a while since i was myself. or the person i think is myself. i want to know how to smile. i’m starting to feel alone. i don’t know what to say in this post. it’s been awhile since wrote in here. a lots happened since.