i’ve been sick. incredibly sick.

it started late saturday night with little warning. while taking jennifer home, i told her i felt a slight pain in my ear. that slight pain grew to an intense pain that climax at 4 in the morning.

i used q-tips, bobby pins, sharp objects… jammed them into my ear and scraped futilely to relieve the pain.

by 5, the pain had traveled down my ear to the back of my jaw. by then i had already taken two pills of advil and some codine i had left over from when i broke my arm 2 years earlier.

the pain was not subsiding.

swallowing my own spit was becoming a task. instead, i made frequent trips to the bathroom sink to spit. drinking water was painful. eating something was unheard of.

mid sunday, the fever started. i now was too weak to even venture to the bathroom to spit.

sunday night, my mom fed me dinner that i couldn’t eat.

i talked to my sister monday. she asked me if i was locked up in my room. and i said yes. she wasn’t surprised. “you never ask for help,” she scoffed. it made me think. it’s true. i didn’t tell anyone i was sick except to those that asked. i wonder why i’m like that.

it’s 3:15 tuesday. my schedule says i have class right now. but i got an email a couple hours earlier from my teacher. class canceled. i get a few more hours to rest. maybe someone up there is looking out for me.

i’m sick. still sick. the fever is gone. but it still hurts to swallow. i still spit in the sink.

here’s what i’ve eaten since hometown buffet saturday night.
– 2 advil
– 1 codine
– 4 antibiotic pills
– 12 tylenol
– half a banana
– a can of pepsi
– an apple
– one and half bowls of cereal
– half a veggie dinner roast
– half a bag of ramen

so, though i’m in incredible pain the upside is that my weight is down to 164.4. it’s the first time i’ve been under 165 in a couple months. my sister was quick to point out i’ll gain that weight back once i start eating.

hope i’m ok by tomorrow