My girlfriend signed me up for one of those hollywood juice cleanses and I’m not going to lie; I’ve been a little bit excited to try it. After a week delay, the day is almost here. It’s not until the night before do I actually look at the instructions to what it entails.

I’ve got no problem putting weird things in my body to make it ‘better’. I grew up drinking weird juice concoctions like carrot/apple/spinach (I almost wanted to spell it spinage) juice. If a fruit/vegetable looked like it contained juice, my mom would juice it. She’d say it’s apple juice or carrot juice… but of course, there would be surprise cabbage inside.

Growing up, I also drank Chinese medicine. Koreans call it hanyak. Yuck, indeed. This stuff contained roots and dirt and deer antler and other things I consider to be mulch all brewed together. Back in the day, my mom had this hanyak brewing machine. When it was on, it’d fill the house with the unique aroma I can only relate to as beach sand during rain. The strainer in the machine was anything but a strainer as my drinks were always left with a little bit of soot and branches at the bottom of the cup that my mom made me swallow because it was good for me.

“You may experience some detox symptoms during the course of your cleanse, such as headaches, dizziness, fatigue, constipation, runny nose, skin eruptions and nausea.”

Umm.. what am I getting myself into. The half of instructions to the cleanse are warnings. It says don’t sweat it. I read somewhere (not from PJ) that when doing a juice cleanse my sweat will be toxic and I should restrain from activities that’ll make me sweat too much and I should shower if I do. PJ does recommend I do light walking.

I’m supposed to drink a lot of water. It’s weird that I’m going to be only drinking juice, but I need to drink more water. It also tells me that it’s probably the best time for me to do a colonic.. I think I’ll pass on this one.

There’s a 3 day prep that I’ve neglected to start until today. Today, Jessica made me little lunch/dinner packages to make sure I stay on track. Salad for lunch. Sushi for dinner. Not my normal cup of tea but not bad. On a side note, I love when people leave me notes (on the side).

I don’t know. I haven’t even started and I’m already starting to get a little hungry. This is going to be a long 3 days.